Ok I was sad when my daughter went away to college last year. Now that she has moved back in for the summer, she is driving me crazy!! She didn't go that far away to the University. It is only 10 or 12 miles from our house, but we moved her into the dorm. She needed the independence for confidence, and we thought it would give her more of the college experience. She is by nature a homebody which I use to think was nice. She is a very good straight laced level headed kid. She has now moved back home for the summer. She has a part time job close by, however, her schedule does NOT coincide with our schedule. For instance: she stays up late in her room on her computer till the wee hours of the morning. When she was in high school she used one of the family computers downstairs and was restricted access at certain times of the day. But we did buy her her own laptop for college. So now she stays up late and gets up at almost noon. I have served and cleaned up breakfast by that time, and it isn't lunchtime, so and I've closed the kitchen. I tell her she just needs to wait till lunch time. So she uses her money to get junk food at the 7/11 down the street. Stuff I would never buy and don't like her eating. Grrr. When she was at college she had the freedom to eat where and when she wanted. I have found I can only pull in the reigns so far. It is my kitchen. I make my 12 year old and my older son and hubby eat what I fix. I don't make separate meals for everyone although I do take food preferences into consideration when meal planning. Same thing happens when she gets home from work. I save food for her but she buys her own then wants to mess up my kitchen at 10 oclock at night after she gets back from work. Next year she will move into a dorm with a kitchen and will have to prepare her own food. She will not be on the meal plan. She knows how to plan frugal healthy meals she just doesn't do it. That bugs me! Maybe it shouldn't bug me. I need to let go and let her be more independent.
Chores. She still does chores now that she has moved back in. She of course does her laundry. She keeps her room clean (not always to my standards) but ok. She only stays out late at work. I actually wish she would do more with her friends which are all good kids. She is a homebody and just wants to hang at home when she isn't working. I keep the TV off during the day. Actually we got rid of satellite and only have broadcast now. I hate regular TV and we really only use the TV now to watch dvd's. The only show I care to watch is "According to Jim". She likes to turn the TV on during the day and watch junk. Ok I put my foot down and say the downstairs is my space so I want the TV off. Well she can just go to her room and watch you tube or itunes or netflix movies on her computer. I want her to get out and do some activities on her own! I don't want her underfoot. She has good values and is not a trouble maker or anything which is awesome, but I also don't want her sitting around the house during the summer. She commuted to the University and took one class this summer which she aced, but that session is over now. I have to look, but I know she doesn't go back till the end of August .
When you have little kids, you as the mom control almost every aspect of their lives. It is soo different when they are young adults. I can only pray that we have raised her well and that she will make good choices. I only have so much control anymore as to what she wears, eats, watches on TV or who she hangs out with. So even though it bugs me that she doesn't make the exact choices I would I have to let it go and know that it is OK.
She loves God. She is a faithful Christian. She still loves going to Church with us and doing things with us as a family. She gets along with her brothers. She has a 3.8 GPA at the University and 2 scholarships which pay for almost everything. She saves her money, and for the most part (except for the junk food) knows the value of a dollar and spends her money wisely. She is not spoiled.
Just pray I survive the summer. Letting her go back to the dorm in the fall is going to be so much easier than last year. :-)